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26 September 2008 @ 07:18 pm
20 September 2008 @ 03:47 pm
I guess it is a cold but I don't feel much like I have a cold, maybe a little drained.  Then I have this cough that sucks.  My chest hurts.  Cos has been congested since we had three days of rain and even Icy is a little congested.  I hope whatever it is goes away really soon. 
Went for a nice bike ride with the girls before they left for Dad's.   Things like, "I've never done this before" were flying out of the wee ones mouth.  They are so much fun.  I love riding with them, except when the eldest goes daredevil on me.  We rode to the store and talked about how good that is for our environment.  Walking or riding to the store.  It has been a busy week with the onset of scouts and finding time to fit everything into our hectic lives, learning to be ok with just swimming for half an hour and finding time for other things like the library as well.   I noticed I just want to sleep lately, I think that is this thing in my lungs though as that hasn't been normal for me since I left the icky house.  I am just so grateful that I have a healthy place to stay.  It is just really cool to be cared for.  I can't explain it.  I love the action over here too.  I've gotten to meet and learn to know different people much more closely than I would have had I not been living here.  It has been quite a joy!  Well, time to make some oatmeal:)  Trying to keep up with taking care of my good cholesterol.  My good cholesterol is low while my bad cholesterol is fine, regardless of the bad being fine I'm at an increased risk of heart disease because the good cholesterol is low, so, it is my job to get it higher.  I take niacin daily and exercise and eat oatmeal:)

Happy Autumnal Equinox!!!
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15 September 2008 @ 09:41 am
Yeah... I love learning German!
14 September 2008 @ 10:25 pm
i wished i was at Burning Man again.  I thought about it and talked about it in the hot tub at the YMCA when it came up in conversation.  I was complaining about my back that the chiro has been working on.  I mentioned it might be a result of a 4000 mile trip with only one night in a hotel room.  The woman laughed and asked what I was doing out in NV.  I did mention a state.  So we talked BM for about 15 min then it came up that we go to the same church.  Now I'm not a member yet, but I think I will be.  I see it happening.  She was really super sweet after that but I could already tell she was a FREE thinker.  She was interested in going.  So Mary and I had a nice chat after a nice service and a nice swim.  Then I came home and just about fell out so I call Wayne up and told him maybe it would be best if the kids went to him.  He was amicable and so it went that I took a nap before the CUUPS full moon ritual that I thought was beautiful. 
Yesterday I went to chicago and had homemade hummous, got a new pair of docs.  Saw shoes made just for the playa at the Alley and was tempted.. VERY tempted.  Plus they had a sale.  I got two bondage bracelets and I even got a new whip from the Leather store... woo!  Then I got home and snuggled up and went to sleep.  It has been a full weekend.  I'm grateful that I have people who love me.  I love being surrounded by love and peace.  I'm not always peaceful.  So now it is just a matter of getting a bunkbed for Cosie and seeing if W is really into that idea of building a storage facility and if he is... sweet.  I've got the cash for it.
12 September 2008 @ 09:11 am
I have the look of being quite busy.  And honestly I am busy lately.  But I have these few hours during the day that are all mine.  And Saturday.  Not that i can't have a day with kids.  I do miss them when they are with dad.  But activities keep piling on.  Next week it will be the addition of Girl Scouts.  Icy's troup starts meeting next week. 
I am really impressed by how much Burning Man has influenced my life and my thoughts and well everything.  I'm grateful my closer friends went.  A nod can suffice at times for the struggle of coming to terms with real life after living in utopia.  I am planning my trip already.  I mean I'm planning little things like putting the money for the ticket aside and gas and thinking about what "I" can do for Evolution or just for the playa.  What can I give to the community?
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08 September 2008 @ 11:29 pm
I was reading my new friends journal... Quite a bit to read to get a grasp on who she is and all that. I am jealous. She has decompression events happening already in her area. I suppose it could be that there are events like this in Chicago but in Rockford??? I'd be really surprised. And honestly, newbies need something. I am still full of regret that I didn't push for the temple burn and I know I was right not to get attached to the temple. I just had a feeling that no matter how badly Z said he wanted to stay for it. It wasn't going to happen. I know more now and I'm glad for the inner knowing. I know now how important it is and for all the reasons Z said it was.

I was talking to T today about how he is doing. He has said that getting back into the mundane groove has been really tough for him and he feels different.

We rehashed a lot of BM moments. We talked again about how brutal the environment is and how hard it is to be anything but your raw self out there.

My kids are making me totally nuts today.. Ok I'm allowing myself to be nuts because I'm a mom. I shouldn't say today because it has been a really great day. I did my dentist thing, went to the chiropractor, scored on two tops at Old Navy for Cos who has nothing. I'm really glad that they put cool stuff on sale so she can at least have a few "cool" clothes.
My friend just left she came over for a couple hours and told me all about her life then wanted to know about my burning man experience. I got to show off pictures and the whole bit:) She is all like yeah, I want to go to burning man.. And I'm all like yeah you should:D I doubt she will go just yet. I'm also promoting Women Within to her hoping she will peel off some layers.

I totally left this sit for hours so now I'm just gonna post it and add more later.

08 September 2008 @ 02:55 pm
I pulled my last post because I realized it may be disrespectful to real vegetarians. I've always flirted with it.. That is why I have a lot of vegetarian friends. I always said if I didn't have the man I was with in my life I might be able to do it. I think I might. I don't know for sure though that I can live through thanksgiving. I'm trying to read a lot right now so that I don't come off like and idiot when I'm considering how I feel. I saw something at Burning Man about meat next to the bacon shack that made me cringe, while living in camp with several vegetarians. It is not natural for me to want to eat meat normally. I'm not the type of person who just craves it. I make certain things so that my children have a proper diet, but the only meat I really buy is salmon. I'm trying to learn about proteins and such. I think I've come to a point in my life where I can finally align my beliefs with my actions and I'm gonna say... It feels pretty fucking good. I have not eaten any meat since I left burning man. I thought I had a slice of pepperoni pizza the day I got back but on reflection I recall not eating that because I didn't want to bind up my system. I did not any meat after Weds at Burning Man. Weds was the day I had a tiny piece of home made beef jerky. I don't know if this will stick or not. But like quitting smoking, which I've mostly achieved (I say mostly because there have been a couple puffs here and there), I think it is on the horizon. If not today then soon.
08 September 2008 @ 09:27 am
I love TAAS (new album just out). I wish I lived in Seattle still so I could go see them. Although they will be in Europe soon. Of course out here in the extended Chicagoland we have Russian Circles whom are just amazing. AMAZING.
Henry Rollins is playing at the Vic in Chicago soon. I think I want tickets to see Henry and some food from the Jerusalem restaurant and... new Dr. Martens.. I really need a new pair of boots, only been living off the ones I have for like six years, maybe longer. I don't know if I can continue with the over ten year long theme of purple but I can try:) So yeah, I think that is 10/25 that Rollins own the Vic. I haven't seen Rollins since he did a spoken work with Lydia Lunch in Seattle.
Overall life is GREAT. I'm working away at all the things on my list of things I need to do. It is a long one. I am absolutely sure with time I will take everything off of my list:) Yesterday I returned to the UU church and swam and saw my folks. It was an awesome day! Although lately, days seem pretty decent.
I suppose I'm right where I am suppose to be.
05 September 2008 @ 11:35 am
I return home and find that my youngest has the largest case of ringworm I've ever seen. I start treating it of course cause that is what you do and I make an appt for the doctor who says, "Wow, how long has she had that ringworm!" I guess I feel a little guilty for leaving them for a week but I did leave medical information for their father to take them to the Dr. if necessary. Well, later today she will have all the medicine she needs for it to be taken care of. Their Dad said it probably came from school but my eldest daughter informed me that their friend whom stayed the night with them and "Grandma Kay's" house had a spot much like Icy's. hmmm.

Today I found the birth certificates so I need to go and start my passport information. I am already starting the child support stuff so that I can have enough to live on. I will be starting Cos's counseling again next week. I don't know if I can bill Ronald Richtart the guy who likes to fondle little girls for that or not. I will have to call DHS and find out if I can still bill that son of a bitch. There is no excuse for that kind of shit. I think child molesters should be castrated.

So yeah.. passport, child support, pick up from Walgreens, pick up the girls from school for swimming, kirtan tonight in Milwaukee, restructure my insurance on the car, and talk to my parents.